slowpoke_gif | come on and take a test drive (test drive)!

[Who the heck just runs around with straight up cash in their hands like some kind of loser just waiting for it to get snatched? Apparently Jon Arbuckle over here, which catches the attention of a very large Drifblim who's just looking for a reason to ""drift"" away from his trainer.

Which he does.

I mean, when you sing and hum like that, you're pretty much begging for attention.

So there he is, one giant ass balloon that hovers down right in front of the Game Corner door. Golly, just look at that money. The balloon wears the cutest little smile as he eyes it, then back at pointless human #33897558754.]

[It's Mr. Arbuckle to you can't read the title of his show.

Blissful joy goes to irritation when he bumps into this balloon-shaped Pokemon, bouncing back almost comically to look up at it. Spinda isn't too far behind, bumping into his legs and spinning onto its butt.

It's...certainly large, that's for sure.]

Ehhhh?

[He stares for one second at this creature. So cute and standing in his way.

With a single motion of his free hand, he pushes it out of the way.

Or attempts to.]

[Oh wee lamb.

The moment Mr. Arbuckle's hand makes contact with the Drifblim's weird, rubbery body, its bizarrely long hand-like tendrils just sorta wrap around his arm in the world's most awkward handshake. The kind where the other person never lets go.

The kind where the other person is some kind of weird giant ghost balloon.

The kind where the weird ghost balloon continues to smile all cute like while his arms continue to wrap their way up his.

The kind where those beady red eyes seem to glow as he gazes into his very soul--]

Murasaki!

[Oh for the sake of fuck. And just like that, his fun is over because up runs probably one of the weeniest looking trainers. Komasan may not know what's going on, but he's relieved this kind stranger was able to find his Pokemon for him.]

Thanks for finding him, zura! [He pants in between words. Did...did running over here really take that much out of him...?] He...he really likes to play, zura.

[Murasaki may not be able to finish what he started, but that doesn't mean he has to let go. In fact, to cover his nonexistent ass, he begins to wave Oso's arm around like a prize. Look! It followed him home, can he keep it?!]

[The Fletchling watches this play out, unsure if she should stop her owner from making a giant mistake or to let him find out on his own. Not that she could really stop a damn Drifblim anwyay. She watches those tendrils wrap around Osomatsu's hand in it's own version of a handshake. Watches as now Osomatsu is probably the real balloon here, with the Drifblim being the holder.

There's a soft chirp as she watches, and more importantly, watches the colour drain from Osomatsu's face.

He can feel his soul being looked into. He can feel Drifblim staring at the trash that makes up his filthy NEET heart...

"Murasaki!"

Colour returns to his face as he moves to find the owner of his voice. Osomatsu's head turns, as if the idea that a ghost balloon holding onto him is just now just a thing of the past, letting him wave his arm around like the limp noodle it is.]

....This is yours?

[A quick glance to Murasaki, then a look to Komasan. And then finally a look to his Fletchling.]

He's really friendly!!

[And...with one motion, he moves his arm with...surprising strength that defies his body type, beginning to shake Murasaki must like the Pokemon was shaking his arm.]

[As Murasaki is effortlessly moved, the bottom of his eyelid begins to twitch as he tries VERY HARD to keep that smile on his face. You son of a—

Out of the kindness of his heart, the giant balloon gives off an electric shock out of nowhere because guess who knows TM moves you red little bast—

Still smiling, he eventually lets go after his improv hand buzzer and holds up his hands as if to say "WHOOPS," floating back to his trainer's side. Said trainer doesn't seem to comment on his Pokemon's poor behavior, but it's more like he's just oblivious rather than believes this is an Okay Thing to Do™]

Yeah, he loves texting people the most, zura.

[Because Komasan just feels like this stranger will care about that.

Wait.

Wait a second.

What is that?!]

MONGE!!

[Komasan pushes past Osomatsu as he dives for his Spinda, getting onto his knees as he begins to play with the creature's ears. Its long, swirl patterned ears.]

I-I've never seen a Pokemon like this before, zura!! No one told me there was a swirl one, that's sooo cute, zura~!! Look, see? We could be brothers, zura!

[No worries on that front, Osomatsu is used to the abuse--the joys of being in a gag anime. But that doesn't mean that he doesn't react to it, the tips of his hairs now crispy and the convenient little burn mars all over his skin and clothes from that comedy-level shock he just received.

You little asshole.

Eyes narrow at that balloon as he lets go, floating back over behind Komasan. Giving the look as if to say 'this isn't over'. Because it's not. He'll make sure of it.

But his attention is quickly drawn away from his newfound rival, staring as Komasan all but jumps at his Spinda. The thing seems so confused from the sudden attention, it's swirly eyes...somehow looking surprised and bashful all at the same time as he feels his ears being played around with.]

Eh? Spinnymatsu?

He was given to me by some old guy...

[It didn't look too impressive when he first got it, either...but apparently it's rare? Huh.]

I hope an old guy gives me free stuff someday, zura.

[Says Komasan who acts like he never got a starter for some reason. He continues to gleefully play with the Spinda like it's his own personal stuffed animal, and by "play" I mean "squish its face obnoxiously because that's just how he rolls."]

Monge~ You're so lucky to have such a great starter, zura~ [The squishing soon becomes puppeteering as he presses its cheeks close together to make the lips move.] "Oh my swirls," zura!

[There's a small, almost dry laugh at his own horrible humor.]

Why would you even go to the game place when you can just play with this Pokemon all day, zura~

[Spinnymatsu doesn't really mind it, either, leaning into the touches and smushes of its face. In fact, it's own paws reach up to smush the swirls of Komasan's own face, giving a soft little coo in return.

Osomatsu can't help but smile fondly at watching the two play, a finger rubbing just under his nose as a little idle gesture. It's...cute. It's really cute, honestly. And even his trashy heart can't help but be warmed at how happy they look.

Spinnymatsu can't help but try and repeat Komasan, "Oh my swirls" just a bunch of 'Spin Spindaaaa!!"]

Well, today's a special mission! Word on the street is you can win Pokemon from this place if you're good at gambling!

[He loops an arm around Komasan's shoulders to show him the...sudden magazine he has, advertising the Game Corner, and more importantly, the prize of a Dratini.]

I'm going to win myself one of those! It's got beauty! Charisma! Excitement!

And best of all, COOL!

[It's funny how Captain Squish Your Face is suddenly caught off guard by the sudden invasion of his personal space. Not the Spinda's, the Spinda is fine. It's when Osomatsu places his arm around him that he gives him a concerned glance.

And then one at his magazine.

And then one back at him.]

It looks like a giant worm, zura.

[Not that Komasan doesn't like worms, but he's never heard them described in such a manner before. Maybe this guy likes to collect bugs, too... Are worms even considered a bug? Do people collect them?

If Osomatsu doesn't pay attention -- and it's hard when you're staring at that beautiful super worm -- Murasaki does in fact slip behind him. Oh, he saw that face earlier, don't think he didn't, and he couldn't agree more. This isn't over. So with that in mind, just where did he put that money...]

You know a lotta people breed that Pokemon, you can just buy an egg, zura...

Bahhhh, you can't look at it like that! Look at those little things for ears! And the jewel on its forehead! And those eyes that basically go--

[He clasps his hands together, eyes becoming soft and cute.]

"Please...give me a hug...."

[Clearly this has got potential! Why would it be worth so much if it wasn't amazing?

Osomatsu might not notice Murasaki slipping up behind him to look for that cash, but Chuu-chan certainly does, the little Fletchling hopping opposite on his shoulder to stare at the giant balloon.

Black eyes suddenly curious.]

I'll have it by the end of the day, easy peasy.

Monge...

[That does sound pretty cute. Maybe not Dunsparce cute, but close.]

Are...are you really that good at gambling, zura?!

[Komasan didn't trust the slots, or rather, he didn't trust himself with the slots. It was easier to just work his job and make money rather than risk it. But...if someone was really good at them...]

C-Could I watch, zura? Just for a little bit! I won't make a sound, zura.

[Do not trust this swirly faced demon. He will make all the sounds.

Also wow, little bird, Murasaki is totally afraid. Except not really. In fact, he has to keep himself from laughing, it's too ridiculous. What's it gonna do?! Be a...small...bird...? Wait, what can it do? Komasan never really did hook up with a bird Pokemon before, that was the niche Murasaki filled. Do they have their own special sort of...bird moves? A brave one, perhaps?

Oh who the hell cares, maybe it's dumb. Silently, like some kind of balloon phantom, Murasaki points past the tiny Fletchling as if to mime the "LOOK OVER THERE" routine.]

It depends on the day, you know? Sometimes good luck just follows you, sneaks up on you when you least expect it.

Me? I'm feeling luuuucky today!

[Truth be told, his results are mixed at best. But like he's really gonna talk about his losses in front of this guy he just met. Who does that? Not anyone smart, that's for sure.]

Heeeyyy~ Lucky for you, I don't get nervous with people watching, so it'll be good to have someone be my--how would he say it--[He puts on a deeper voice, one that sounds almost painful on some level. In fact, he might even be wearing sunglasses just for these three words:] partner in crime!

[Murasaki was quite the intimidating Pokemon, after all, it had shocked Osomatsu pretty good, and Chuu-chan wasn't dumb enough to ignore her own weaknesses.

But she is a sly fucker, glaring when that balloon attempts to distract her, Eyes only dart for a second to see if he really did have something to look at, glare intensifying before...

Pecking Osomatsu's head.

She doesn't need to attack you to foil your plan, butthead.]

OWW!!

CHUU-CHAN!! ARE YOU STUPID?

[Guess who's spinning his head around now to look at her, eyes narrowed and--seeing Murasaki there.]

Edited 2016-05-22 00:07 (UTC)

[Murasaki isn't sure what to do and just sort of...hovers there. On one hand, that was hilarious, on the other, he wants that god damn money. If there's one thing he's not though, it's scared. He doesn't care if Osomatsu can see him now, it's not important, the guy is clearly a grade A moron. All he has to do is continue pointing and the dummy will probably turn around.

That is, of course, until Komasan sees Osomatsu isn't looking at him anymore and rushes over towards his Drifblim, pushing him away lightly as he rests against his giant inflatable body.]

I-I'm not a criminal, zura!

[Yes, that was apparently important enough to interrupt whatever you guys were doing over here. Once again, Murasaki's eyelid starts to twitch.]

How could you say that, you don't even know me, z-zura!! My Ma would never speak to me again, zura!!

[What are you going to do with money Murasaki you don't have a shirt or shoes. You don't even have feet! She seems satisfied enough with that result, ignoring Osomatsu's little insult to her.

His ass can thank her later. Now he can lose that money at the slots like he was originally going to.

Osomatsu, though, turns around to look at Komasan as that little...confession? happens, rubbing the part on his head where Chuu-chan had pecked.]

Ow...that really hurt, Chuu-chan. You're supposed to use that on POKEMON, not me...Jeez...

[Oh, Komasan said something about not being a criminal, didn't he?]

Eh? What's with the suspicious attitude?

[He truly doesn't think Komasan is--the guy doesn't look like he could cut in line let alone steal something. But when has Osomatsu ever been direct?]

[Suspicious... attitude?]

A-A-Ah...

[Komasan freezes, he doesn't understand what he's hearing. Is he really that suspicious? Did...did he look like a bad person? Doubt begins to flood his mind, maybe he does. What if all this time everyone thought he was a part of that "Team Rocket" he hears so much about?!

What does he do to clear his good name?!

What does he say?!]

M-MONGE?!

[I mean...I guess that works.

Yeah, no, Murasaki has no idea what to do either. He just gives Osomatsu an awkward look and shrugs. Don't make him explain Komasan, he barely understands him himself.]

[Osomatsu blinks at that, giving a prolonged...blank stare at Komasan as he tries to sort this out himself. In a way, it was the same sort of strangeness he saw from Jyushimatsu...not that it was a bad thing. If anything, at least Komasan didn't have the sheer superhuman abilities and strength Jyushimatsu had.

One upside. Many, many upsides.

Osomatsu bursts into laughter, though, arm slinging around him once more as he goes to make his way into the game corner.]

Well lose that look in there, okay? We've got to keep our cool when we win!

[Whatever just happened, it clearly doesn't worry Osomatsu in the least. Chuu-chan 'sighs', shaking her head. Komasan may be weird, but Osomatsu isn't all that far behind.]

come on and take a test drive (test drive)!

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