Route 29: mods (
these_balls) wrote in
slowpoke_gif2015-04-24 05:24 pm
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test drive!

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no subject
Well, uh.
[How does he put this.]
Saying you do manage to pull my sorta bony but not insubstantial carcass up there with you.
[The kid is pretty tall, and without god tier powers, no longer weightless. But that's not even the problem.]
How are we supposed to get back up through the first trap door?
no subject
Guessing cutting our way through isn't gonna work, no matter how sharp Hanzo's been lately. [Hanzo, short for Hanzo Steel, aka the best Nincada he arrived in this place with.]
Do you think going through the door down there'll kick us back up to the top? [How does that even work? Probably video game logic. Of course.]
no subject
Happiny!
[Eltee punches Dave in the leg again, then tries to tug him back from underneath the trap door. He gives up on the rope harness and goes along with it. Sorry, bro, but if he didn't get an ass cushion, then you don't, either.]
Come on, help me figure this one out. It says 'water' in goofy Poké-English but hell if I know what I can do here. Spit on it?
no subject
Fuck it. [Final answer.] Look out below. [Hops down. No kidding about that fall, jeez, his ass is gonna sue him for damages later, if it ever finds a good enough lawyer.
He's pulling down the rope and putting it back in his bag, once he's done mentally cataloguing the bruises.] Well, let's put spitting in the maybe column for now. [Thinking goes here.] You have anybody who knows Water Gun over there?
no subject
[He releases his as-yet-unnamed Espurr. It blinks owlishly in the dark, then turns its head slightly to stare off into space, thinking unknowable Espurr thoughts.]
I. Don't think it knows any Water moves.
[Dave watches it for a moment. He's still. Kind of unsure about this thing.]
You?
no subject
Besides Hanzo? [Gonna release him from the ball now, just in case. It immediately starts gnawing at the ground a little, scuffing it with its little insect claws. What a cutie <3] Nah, all I've got's a Furret. [Name TBD.]
Well, fuck, maybe we can fake it? [They don't have a hose down here, do they.]
no subject
Dave, meanwhile, looks...less enthused.]
Fake it with what?
[Did Mom give YOU a hose, bro? Because Dave sure doesn't have one in his backpack.]
I mean. I can think of one thing that's, like, ninety-five percent water, but I'm mostly hoping it doesn't come to that? Because last I remember, this was supposed to be a family-friendly franchise. I don't want to be caught literally pissing on people's childhoods.
no subject
Oh, god. [He should totally have something for this, and he does not.] There's gotta be a way out of here that won't get us sued by Nintendo in the process.
[Oh, shit, he's got it. Not the witty rejoinder, but an idea! Because, while he doesn't carry a hoze in his backpack, he does have a couple cans of soda. As usual.] Stand back, unless you want sticky shoes for the next two days.
[Soda Pop saves the day again! Hopefully. Let's just. Shake it up first, you know, for maximum Water Gun immersion, and then---]
How's the hole situation looking? [Please don't let it open under them. Again.]
no subject
Eh, should be fine as long as you're not standing directly in front of the thing. Maybe hold on to me so I can yank you back just in case, I think I'm in the clear over here.
[He sounds a lot more confident than he actually is, but even as he eyes the floor beneath his feet warily, he offers Dirk a hand.]
no subject
[So still a bit of a joke. Just more of a worry joke than a pretend to be a super villain/cliche one. But he does grab on to the hand, after a moment's thought.]
Everybody out of the splash zone? [He looks around at the assembled Poké crew, and figures that's close enough.] Alright, here we go.
[Soda Pop: deployed.]
no subject
...And, for the purpose of not getting stuck in the middle of a ruin for the rest of their suddenly natural lives and/or the duration of this test thread, the trick works. Something clicks audibly, and though Dave starts to tug Dirk out of the way, it turns out there's no real point, as they'd pretty much sussed out the trapdoor's location. These kids are all safe.
When he's sure of that, Dave lets go of Dirk and, accompanied by Eltee and the Espurr, peers over the edge of the door into the chamber below.]
You don't think these all just keep going, do you? This isn't some kind of prehistoric "It just keeps happening" joke.
no subject
Trap doors to the center of the pokéworld? [He's considering it. Just that kind of guy.] There's gotta be a bottom floor sooner or later. [He just hopes that floor's not magma.]
Could go in first. [Shrug. Somebody's gotta.]